A female German shepherd was the
smartest dog I ever lived with. Her vocabulary was in the 100 English words range
plus a few guttural sounds I occasionally produce. She knew the difference
between front door and back door, I could tell go to my bedroom and she would.
In general I have noted that female dogs are smarter than male dogs. This is
not always true but the two smartest canines I had the pleasure of living with
were both female. Most dogs have small vocabularies, sit, down, stay, heel and
maybe another half dozen words.
Dogs don’t speak English very well
but they do speak body language. Dogs are precisely tuned to our body language.
It is said that dogs can smell fear. I think not, they read the body language
of fear. I can even read the body language of fear. Actors can portray fear on
a screen without any words and certainly no smell is available to the audience.
My current two year old female Chow knows my mood the moment I get out of bed
in the morning. She has bonded with my wife and can read her like an open book,
if something scares my wife the Chow will immediately go into a protection
mode. A close friend of mine entered our house unexpectedly, quickly and
loudly. This startled my wife and the Chow placed herself between my friend and
my wife, this 185 pound male in good physical condition was suddenly faced by
40 pounds of claws and snarling teeth, he is another dog aficionado and responded
correctly by not moving. I entered the room shook his hand did the male chest
bump and the situation was defused, the Chow’s aggression dropped to a guarded
watch. I try to teach my dogs that when they sense stranger danger make lots of
noise and leave any required action to me. To date none of my dogs have bitten
anyone but they did tree one stranger, he escaped by climbing a tree in my back
yard. He did not have a creditable reason for being in my yard and I dialed 911
to have him removed by the county sheriff. All in all I was pleased by the way
the dogs handled the incident and rewarded them with ample scraps from a nearby
BBQ restaurant. It turned out that the stranger was wanted as a “peeping Tom”.
Dogs don’t speak English so I had
to learn how to speak dog. The dogs speak for “there’s a cat in the front yard”
is different from the bark for “there is a stranger in the front yard”. A dog
can tell me they need to go outside for their nightly constitution or they need
fresh water in their bowl. Somehow they know what time it is, never missing
dinner time, always reminding me if I am only a little late. They speak with grunts, modulated
barks, pawing, head butts and groans.
Dogs don’t speak English but you
can’t lie to a dog. We should allow dogs to vote, I am certain this would
result in a much better selection of elected officials.
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